AIWSTAC ‘20

Before we begin, let me tell you that it’s not just CAT or XAT or any competitive exam that I want to tell you about, it is about my attitude and all of what I went through since I dreamt of going to a top b-school. I’ll begin with what I feel has been me over the past year by quoting what I think is, well, my motivation — ‘Till I collapse by Eminem’

Till the roof comes off, ‘till the lights go out

‘Till my legs give out, can’t shut my mouth

‘Till the smoke clears out, am I high? Perhaps

I’mma rip this shit, ‘till my bone collapse

Well, everything about my life till now has been average. Average academics ( oh no! below average for sure). Average UG. Average job. Average everything (except my girlfriend for sure, she is gorgeous btw and if you are reading this bruv, I am still not sure about that diamond ring you know ;)

Haha. Let’s not digress from the main purpose of this write-up. So, I got just about average percentiles in both the competitive exams I gave this year. Couple that with poor academics (8/7/7; you keep on giving me that smirk from the corner you snarl ICSE) and the crown GEM, so I hope by now you can understand how deadly such a combination can be if one aims to convert any top b-school, well at least in India. No, don’t worry, I won’t rant about the whirlpool of injustices.

Let me rewind it now for you. It’s quite an uneventful journey about me who, after looking at his CV, thought about doing an MBA after at least two years of work experience, but why? Because I read about it and felt like the most logical thing to do. But, here’s a bit upturn to this fact that naive me didn’t think about preparing for the exams while working, and I tell you I paid heavily for it.

So as I was completing my two years at work, I took up preparations with little enthusiasm. Again why now and not earlier? Because I liked how I lived in Bangalore in that beautiful flat. We were a group of 4 friends and if anyone is remotely aware of the life around Bangalore, let me confirm it for you — it is bliss. So, we used to go on a bike ride to explore with our Go Pro’s, recording everything, staying in possibly the best locations and enjoyed five days of work that came after because that’s when we used to plan our next weekend getaway.

Fast forward a bit, my girlfriend graduated out of a b-school & started working for a big 4 with some top-shot pay. This thing invariably affected my seriousness. Anyhow, I took CAT 19 and the lack of preparation and zero mock practice reflected on the scorecard. The results came & they were pathetic, early 70’s and 60’s percentiles. So, again I was back to square one.

After 2019, what happens for the next year is a process. A process made out of determination. Honestly, If you asked me a year back if I’ll be joining this college, I’d probably have scoffed at you. What I did, and I believe everyone should do is — ‘never stop believing’.

I had a series of 60’s, 70’s & 80’s percentiles before I made it to this college. I don’t possess extraordinary skills when it comes to cracking competitive exams. But never for once, I thought that I shouldn’t be at the place I was at that particular time. When I failed, I accepted it. I got angry with myself. I cursed myself. I felt stuck in the maze of uncertainties. A person like me has seen more failures in life than those elusive victories. In one of my interviews, I was told that ‘I am a quitter’ and what happened for the next couple of minutes there is something that was a reflection of a person I had become.
Don’t worry, I won’t bore you guys with how it went & how you have to prepare for these exams. You already have some excellent sources for this.

Though, here’s a piece of advice from an average GEM — Never doubt yourself or your efforts, nothing is lost in this multitude. Eventually, things will happen the way you haven’t imagined for yourself. Just keep asking yourself the right questions until you find answers to them. I never saw a three digit score in my mocks during all those years. It came when it had to and I am glad that I didn’t give up on the process. Don’t let poor academics or your profile clout your preparation. If I can make something out of nothing, then you guys are much more capable than I am in doing so. Don’t neglect the importance of a strong study group, I realised this very late until I was a part of Malay Sir’s group. It’s imperative to find people who share the same ambitions. “If your skills match your ambitions, you’ll be happy”.

Do not be so lost in these things that you undervalue the care shown by people close to you. I feel myself extremely lucky to have such a great support system in my family. They never imposed anything on me, neither did they worry me about my career. They always had a sense of belief in me and that was enough. I am glad I didn’t let them down. I am thankful to them for providing me with all the basic amenities in life. I truly believe that each and every process has contributed at an atomic level to the person I am today.

At last, this write-up would be incomplete without mentioning my girlfriend and I thank her for the interminable support that she has provided me since we started dating. I carry a bucket full of respect for her mature sense of handling things when I behaved erratically. Her transcending hard work is as important as mine in the journey. There were ups & downs but never did she let me feel alone. Even when my family was struggling, she was there, headstrong, and resolute in making me realise the dream that I had. I truly cherish the bond & love we share.

Now I look back & I see the dots connecting. Though I am taking away all those sumptuous memories I made in this journey, I’ll never forget the person I was when I started.

Till then take care of yourself and the ones close to you, this is not your fight alone. Wish you all the success in life!

Tanmay Sharma, XLRI Jamshedpur class of 2023